The Filipino New Year’s Common Customs, Traditions and Beliefs

The New Year’s customs and traditions change as the years go by but the essence  of the celebration remains the same. I can still remember the way my parents prepare sumptuous foods which the family will share at midnight after praying, before the New Year signals its arrival. However poor or rich people are, they really give it a blast… to have something unusual or “bonggang handaan “ which means in local  lingo as very grand celebration of the New Year. 

The difference between the statuses of life is the way they celebrated this special event. The well-to-do families throw a party or attend parties of friends, while the less fortunate celebrates New Year with just the family members around; also, the kind of foods and entertainment, will tell the difference.The common denominator between the rich and poor is the spirit of preparing something and anything to welcome the arrival of the New Year.

Some of the common New Year's practices of Filipinos are: 

• Preparation of round-shaped fruits. Others say 7 kinds while others say 12 kinds of these fruits which signify the 12 months of the year. Round-shaped fruits because these represent prosperity and bountiful harvest or opportunity. 
• Wearing polka-dot dress or clothing. The same concept as the fruits. 
• General house cleaning. This is to drive away the past misfortunes and negative vibes of the previous year.
• Buying of new things. People’s beliefs that what you have, prepare or do before the year ends will be the measuring stick of what the incoming year will provide.
• Blowing of horns, banging something or making noise, and fireworks. These are believed to be casting off of evils or bad elements.
• Children jumping when midnight strikes. This belief signifies that young people will grow taller when they jump 10 times or as many and as high as they can.
• Cooking and preparing assorted foods. Like all the above-mentioned beliefs, this one means abundance and prosperity. People believe that if you prepare much and different foods, the incoming year will give you more blessings and you will not experience hunger. 
• The undying preparation and presentation of lechon (roasted pig) as the main symbol of prosperity in the banquet or festivities

With more or less 120 Philippine languages or Filipino dialects, practices and customs vary among its group. However and whatever the variations and differences of the preparation and celebration of New Year’s are, the simple fact remains; people in one country or people around the globe celebrate New Year regardless of culture, of distance, of race, and of religious faith.

A very positive and bountiful New Year to everyone!

Happy New Year!

It's now past 11pm, just a few more minutes and the old year will leave to give way to the new one. Here at the terrace, I can see the fireworks, hear the loud music, and see people walking even at this late hour. The signs of merry-making seem everywhere...and yet, I feel sad. 

Maybe it's the place, or maybe it's because it's the first time in years that we spent it alone, just the two of us...or maybe, we're getting older and the "silence" of the place heightens the feeling of "aloneness", or the usual things that  we used to have (the company, the foods, and the partying until dawn) are absent, and maybe I’m missing it? ...or maybe, because New Year is special and most people welcome it with noise and stay awake until midnight or till the wee hours of the morning, which this new place do not adhere too much.

Whatever, I don't want to be melancholic because I can still remember the old saying "never sigh nor feel sad or shed a tear in welcoming the New Year because you will be like that for a year", and who wants to be sad for that long? Huh! No one, of course, so I have to start channeling my mind to some positive thoughts and do some fruitful deeds (like writing something, just to shoo away the bad feelings...or look for something to eat and just have a yakult nearby in case of indigestion ) and greet the New Year with a smile, in my lips and in my heart.

Once again, I’m thanking the modern technology for inventing cell phones and internet which made possible the greetings and wishes of friends and loved ones to be sent and received regardless of distance and time difference.

Just a tick away and its midnight already…5…4…3…2…1…it’s New Year! 2011 is here and I’m still wide awake to welcome it. Horns are blowing…pots, cans, fireworks…everyone’s way of greeting the New Year. Happy New Year! I do hope, this year, it is really a happy new year.

After the noise subsided, and before I go to sleep, I will be on my knees to say my thanks and ask for forgiveness for whatever I have done wrong in the previous year…to wish for fruitful and blissful year, and to ask HIM to guide me, us, in this New Year of unseen journey. God Bless!

Some Insights on Marriage

Some Insights on Marriage

How Simple Greetings Affect One’s Day

I woke up in the wrong side of the bed, so to speak, and don’t feel alright. Maybe it was caused by a bad dream which I can’t recall…or something, the thing was, it's enough to start my day in a “heavy” foot. However, while doing my morning ablutions, my cell phone beeps and when I read the message, it’s just a simple “good morning” from a friend at the other side of the globe. So simple, isn’t it? Very inexpensive but it touches the heart and smile away the bad moods.

That’s it. A simple, inexpensive and effortless gesture starts our day bright and happy. My grandma used to say “try to start the day with a positive note because it will dictate how you make your day."  That's why I make it a habit to greet everyone in the family first thing in the morning , and say it with a smile. Yes, a habit which I really see to it that my husband and children caught and practice too.

A happy start usually ends up with a fruitful day. Happiness is in the heart; it somehow coats our emotions and safeguards us on whatever disappointments we meet during the day. If a person is at peace with the world,  he will see things in a positive way, downgrading the negatives. This mood is contagious, by the way. A smile for instance, is a simple way of greeting but  it does create a chain of reaction, making more people set up a good mood for the day. Isn't it awesome?

So let us do what makes us happy, and others too. Let us start now. Greet your friends, your loved ones, near or far away. Cellphones and internet make them just “fingertips” away. They may be feeling down right now and your greetings will somehow lighten their spirits,  and smile away their bad moods too.

Greetings! Make it a habit, a very nice and beautiful habit.Try it now to a familiar face or to a stranger next to you, give a smile or say "hi." The world will be a better and brighter place to live.

Reasons why Marriage Vows are not Kept Forever

“In richer or poorer, in sickness and in health…till death do us part”, from time immemorial until this day, these are the exact words uttered by the bride and groom when they commit themselves to marriage. These marriage vows are taken seriously by everyone, especially by the two major participants, and at that particular moment they really mean it. Why then, the annulment and legal separation or divorce after a couple of years or months? Is forever having a different meaning now?

When we say commitment, it is a responsibility, a duty to be fulfilled and kept come what may, and so is marriage, especially marriage because it is a lifetime commitment. That is why, before the wedding occurs, so much planning and preparations are made. The future bride and groom undergo seminars; from the government and from the church. Many people are involved in the preparation, why? Because this event is not just an ordinary everyday affair, it is an event which signals the start of a new life for two different individuals. Marriage is a lifetime commitment for two different personalities who will spend their future as partners, trying to face the uncertainties of life together.

If the marriage is pre-planned and both wholeheartedly commit oneself to another, why are there many broken marriages? Here are some reasons from the experts: 

1.  Young couples – marriages which involve young people tend to be shaky. The passion is intense and they thought it’s enough basis to get married. When the intensity of “burning” passion lessens, the weight of marriage responsibilities becomes heavier each day. The maturity level cannot compete with the adjustments of married life.    
2. Unplanned pregnancy – modern times don’t adhere on tradition (consummation of marriage) thus, unplanned pregnancy usually leads to unplanned marriage which also leads to unplanned difficulties of having a new family. Unpreparedness for a new life together eventually resulted to broken marriages. 
3. Financially unstable – starting a family is like starting a business, to put it bluntly. No capital, no gain. An industrial partner is okay but if both are, the marriage will not prosper. The purpose of marriage is to start a family, and starting means independence… in almost everything. 
4. Different priorities – adjustment is the key. As both are two separate individuals (even if the marriage says they become one), the clashes of personalities visit once in a while or maybe often at the first years of marriage.    
5. Work/job – without job, the marriage is doomed and so, is overwork. Both shouldn’t make work a hindrance too. Tired from work, overtimes, out-of-towns, these can loosen the bond of married couples if communication and quality times are affected.   
6. Absence of caring gestures – the rapport and sweetness that deepen the feelings for each other while in courtship or before the marriage shouldn’t be lost through the years of marriage. These loving gestures are the important spices that sweeten the married life. These are the little threads that strengthen the tie that holds together the couple.    
7. Familiarity – sometimes (and most often than not) familiarity tends to lose the respect for both, though unintentionally. “Please”, “I’m sorry”, and other amenities like helping the wife in her tasks or asking the husband’s day at work are forgotten. Being careful in choice of words or actions is ignored because of the feeling of familiarity.    
8. Third party intervention – this is always the case when either one is not in good terms with in-laws. Instead of good advices in times of adjustments, third party’s sidings with kin create more walls to the couple.    
9. Legal separation or divorce – the legalities of separation whatever the reasons are, do not help the patching-up of whatever trouble existing between the couple. The “trying hard” is not hard enough because there is an alternative solution that either of the two or both is seeing, instead of holding on to the binding words of the preacher when they uttered their marriage vows “what God has joint together let no man asunder.”

The meaning of forever in marriage vows may keep on changing depending on one’s perspective or experience, but one thing is for sure: when the bride and groom say their vows to each other during their wedding day, they really mean the words. Their promise to love each other comes from the heart. But love is not enough though it is the foundation; adjustments mean many things to consider. Marriage is a work-in-process that both individuals should face and participate in, they should always be partners in their new life together, enjoying and welcoming each day of knowing and learning about each other…a lifetime of sharing “in richer or poorer…till death do us part.”

Some Insights on Marriage

Marriage is a commitment, and a serious one at that. It is a contract; but unlike the usual contracts, its tenure is forever. There is no probationary or contractual basis, the job is long term and permanent. Before the contract becomes binding, you and your partner have to take an oath and signed your name in the presence of witnesses.It seems so hard, especially the decision-making. The question is: Shall I? Can I?

In committing oneself into something or entering into any agreement which needs a contract, there are basic steps to undergo. In marriage, here are the prerequisites:

• Getting acquainted- getting to know each other. If the attraction is more than friends, the next step follows.

• Wooing stage-the attraction is getting deeper and the guy wanted a proprietary hold on the girl’s attention and feelings.

• Boyfriend-girlfriend stage-there is a mutual understanding, the existence of deeper feelings for each other. This is a kind of commitment but is more like probationary. It is like a testing period if they click or not. The relationship can go on or off.

• Engagement period-both are assured about their emotions and agreed to get married to start the journey together as man and wife. 
• Planning stage-it follows after the engagement which signals the preparation of the wedding. It is the most tedious stage. Be it simple or grand, a wedding needs so much time to prepare everything; the license, the seminars, the church, the entourage, the reception, the honeymoon, etc. Physically, emotionally, and financially, the bride and groom undergo these hurdles.  
• The wedding itself-the excitement, the mixed emotions...the realization of dreams...the end of one phase of life and the beginning of another journey with a partner, for life.

Pressures, stress, not mentioning the pre-wedding jitters and the adjustments of having instant additional families for both, these can be discouraging and make people think twice. However, these reasons are not enough to dissuade people not to get married. Statistics show that more than 2 million Americans get married every year and billions were spent for the weddings. The most popular wedding month is June, hence the “June bride”. Although data states that it is still true in America, it is however not the fashion in other countries. Today, practicality is the name of the month; like this month, December, many of my friends and acquaintances get married and are getting married. Here are their reasons why:

•   This month is more financially stable, bonuses are given.

•   It is a festive month, it’s like the world is preparing for the wedding.

• It is a nice time to start a new life, a new journey with someone you wanted to grow old with…someone to be with, welcoming the New Year.

Marriage is a complex process, before and after the wedding, and not an easy task for everyone concerned especially the bride and the groom but everything is worth it. The contract that binds both to each other is not only a piece of paper but a contract that has the blessings of not only the authorized person who officiates but by the ALMIGHTY GOD HIMSELF. “In richer or poorer, in sickness and in health…till death do us part."

Knowing Your Friends through Different Layers of Attachment

The meaning of the word “friend” varies with the conceptual description of an individual…and sometimes also, basing on his own experience. As we all know “experience is the best teacher”, a very over-used line but grudgingly, still a fact.

Friends can be defined through “layers” of feelings or attachment:

• New friend. You can call someone a friend even if he is just an acquaintance: I want you to meet my new friend.  This stage can move on into a deeper relationship or will remain in the “hi and hello” stage.
•  “Hi and hello” friend- this can be a newly-meet friend or an old acquaintance. The friendship didn’t prosper but still existing.
• An Ally. Others call someone a friend if he is not a foe: is he a friend or an enemy? This kind of friendship is a “freelancer”. 
• “Affinity” friend. There is an affection existing between two individuals. A rapport. This feeling is not measured with the length of time. There are persons who “clicked” even just newly acquainted; and there are “friends” who remain on the “hi and hello” stage even after years of knowing each other.
• Good friends- there are emotional ties existing between individuals. Trust and affection is starting to develop.
• Best friends/special friends- they say that you only have one best friend (that’s why there is that superlative “best” which means the “most”); however, there are times when some things needed to be said to one person and can’t be told to another even those different persons are both very close to your heart. It does liken to some personal things of a woman (make-ups, etc.) each is different and has its own particular usage; all are important but each has its own specific role, same as in individuals. So, you can have as many best friends as you can, depending on your degree of needs or depending on how many special friends you have keep through the years.

Friendship can be found and developed even in a distance, especially nowadays wherein the modern technology bridges the gaps between places...and between people even of different races. A person can have “instant friends” though websites. Nowadays, being old is not a hindrance in learning and adapting to the “internet age” although of course, older people find it harder...to “start”. Upon learning the basics, they just content themselves to the simple  and uncomplicated knowledge offered by the “new world” (emails, chat, simple games, and research). The important thing is, they can communicate with friends and loved ones.

Not straying away from the main topic which is "friend and its layers of emotional ties", another kind of friend or friendship exists. Although it’s not between individuals, there is also an emotional attachment present in this kind of “friendship”. As dog is a man’s best friend before, PC and/or cell phones are the modern best friends of today’s civilization. These things are like body part’s extensions which are very important to one’s existence and vital contemporary means for nurturing relationships (communications)… like in friendship and love.

Making a story with a pen

I was thinking of a new subject to write and while at it, I keep on browsing FB and scan its updates. One of the interesting news I read was about the “special accomplishment” of a very close friend of mine. I was not surprised by her success because I have seen her works. The first time I saw those pictures, I really was captivated. This very talented young lady can capture the beauty of a thing and transfer it in a canvass or on anything she loves to paint or draw into. Yes, if a poet or storyteller can use words to paint something, this young woman can make a story by her pen or pencil or charcoal…and the modern technology makes her better, if not the best  in her field of Arts.

Congratulations cute! More success...more drawings.

a few days of going and looking back...a freshener

Sometimes, we just don't realize that we need some breather...a different scenario for our thoughts, and also for our sights. A few days of different environment refreshes mindsets and physiological perspectives...a taste of forgotten memories in a certain place and moments.
 
A few days, a few hours...an eternity of thoughts and reminiscences. So many people, strangers...a few friends but lasting ones...different foods for the same palates...different languages for the same tongues. I missed the things i didn't know i miss...A tinge of wanting, a silent whisper of the heart for the past emotions...I thought i forgot things that were a "has been"...but now, they're my visitors again.


For the time being, i'll open my heart, my mind, my memory. Like a PC, i'll save it for later. For now, i'll go back even just for a while...and then tomorrow, i'll face reality again.

Family week: It's like a whirlwind

Has anyone experienced traveling like this in one day? From the house, we rode a tricycle going to the seaport; then riding a fast craft to another port; tricycle to the terminal of GT liner (v-hire before) which will only be until their own terminal; taxi to the airport; plane to another airport; then taxi to the bus terminal; 3 hours bus to another terminal; then, taxi to the place you're staying for days before coming back to the place of origin, going through the same process of traveling...again. Hah! is it worth it? yes, if it means (between the intervals of traveling) you have met and seen your family again whom you haven't...for years.

Every minute counts...every day is priceless...every hardship is worth it because you once again created a memory; bonded a stronger tie with your loved ones; and added some pages for your travel experience and stories book.These all  made you wiser and more knowledgeable...despite of the tiredness and exhaustion, both physical and emotional...the twin effect of every enriching experience.

Today's not my day...so it seems

I don't feel well...I feel bad. I can't remember what upsets my stomach. I'm trying to ignore the pains by watching TV but even my favorite movie can't make me forget the 'shooting pains". I even search  the internet about pains and aches...and treatments.

To add up to my miseries, one of my folders in yahoo was gone. Some of my files are saved there. I don't know what's happening. One of my friends asked me about the message I've sent to her yesterday, I said I didn't send any. She then forwarded the message and when I tried to open, the anti-virus appeared and "warned". I changed my password right away.

Hah! I'm really annoyed. It's not my day. Maybe I'll make it an early night and hope that my dreams are good enough to console my sub-conscious; make me feel happy; and put a smile on my face when i wake up on the morrow (and hope that my stomach will settle down  too). Goodnight!

The Hardship Before the Pleasure

Packing before a vacation is very stressful. Not only that, you have to clean everything so that you can have the peace of mind before leaving the house and enjoy the long-awaited "treat". Hah! it's really tiring, so I took some moments for a "breather" because I don't want to start my days-off with a negative feeling.

Writing down feelings is a breather in itself ( and munching something is a natural way of enjoying it). It makes one's perspective clearer... and a simple way of easing out stress. After this "relaxing" moment, I'm ready again to tackle the "unfinished business" of packing. And while at it, I'm trying to imagine the places I'll visit, the friends,and relatives I haven't seen for a while. This is another way of making the hardship of preparing things easier...looking forward for the pleasures of a vacation.

The importance of cellphones

My boys are going back to Manila. They are on their way to the airport right now. I'm worried because their tickets aren't confirmed yet. Their flight was cancelled last week because of some aircraft technicalities or something. All their bags were packed that time 'though they're not excited to end their sem break; and so, when the message came, you can imagine their glee. The text message left a number for further information with regards to re-scheduling, and the boys asked if they can re-schedule 5 days after (a day before their classes resume).

The airport from our present residence is too far. From the terminal, it's a two-hour bus ride to the city and another taxi ride to the airport.That's why i really appreciate the modern technology of communications; the invention of cellphones, which really help a lot especially in times like these.

I miss you GenSan...

A picture, a song, a word, a friend...they trigger something deep within...

This picture makes me remember my "good old days"...and everything that goes with it.

Thanks 'den for posting pics.... Gensan, I'll see you soon!
.

The busy bee is busier today...

I have posted in my other blog (heartwisdom) about the busy bee. I'll double that "bee's busyness' today...hah!

The boys are here for a short  vacation...a short respite from "dorm days". The dizzying bee's buzzing didn't register...just yet, until this morning. I have to sit down now and take deep breaths to regain my bearings. I don't want to see the traces of the "whirlwind" which came by earlier today.

I forgot those days when they were still in college...those moments after breakfast and they just left for school. I think moms can relate with these experiences. From bathroom, beds, kitchen...it's like, typhoon has just been into our home.

But you know these "sentiments" are just like that...sentiments; skin-deep complaints which are small compensations for the joy and contentment of having a complete and strong-bonded family.

Welcome home my darling boys!

The Significance of Today : October 10, 2010 (10-10-10)

I'm reading all the posts in my FB and something really caught my attention...a former student has written about the "uniqueness" of today.  At first glance at my calendar this morning, it is Sunday, the 10th of October, nothing unusual…until I read the post.

This is amazing, very significant, it will never happen again in our lifetime because it only happens once in every 823 years; and we only have lesser than a century life.

Sometimes we're not aware of the significance of some "things" until someone pointed it out.

Enjoy Free Grass (While it Lasts)

lourimar: Attending important occasions of those close to o...

lourimar: Attending important occasions of those close to o...: " Amit and Rhea Joy Wedding This is one of those special events that i really wish to attend. I wanted to witness how the fulfillment of dre..."

Attending important occasions of those close to our hearts: in a distance

 Amit and Rhea Joy Wedding

This is one of those special events that i really wish to attend. I wanted to witness how the fulfillment of dreams and promises finally realized. I have shared the excitements and "contentment" of both, in their unique love story. This very special moment of saying "I do's" for both, happens after 9 years of long-distance relationship.

The sweet and lovely bride, Rhea joy,  is the most "vocal", the most "confident" and the most "fluent" English-speaking Ilongga I've ever met. Don't get me wrong; those traits I've enumerated are in the positive notes.

Talking to her makes you go back to your younger days (our age gap is wide but not wider enough to put a distance on our thoughts and our beliefs). She's "refreshing" because she's not the "usual" young person you meet in your everyday life of mingling with people, especially in our "circle".

Amit, the dashing groom, although i met him only once (last year) is already familiar, because his presence is always felt whenever Rhea and I have those precious moments of bonding. Amit is the senior manager of an IT company in Singapore.

The beautiful couple during the "Wedding re enactment"  in the Philippines inspired with Indian Wedding theme.

Congratulations and Best Wishes !!!

Attending the important occasions of our loved ones: in a distance

Wedding is a very special moment: special, not only to the bride and groom; but also for the parents, relatives,  friends of the wedding couple and of their families.
                                        

Janice and Roiss Wedding

       

Bebot and Fe are like family to us; and so, their children. I was able to attend the wedding of their eldest, Efren, because we're still nearer (one day travel). This one, Janice's wedding, we wanted to witness too but, (and a big BUT), it's too too far from here. Canada is miles and miles away.

Although the distance is so wide, the wishes and congratulations (and virtual hugs) were sent and received.

Best wishes & Congratulations Janice and Roiss!

lourimar: Facts Pregnant women Should Know: Postterm Pregnan...

lourimar: Facts Pregnant women Should Know: Postterm Pregnan...: "I hope this post will be a great help to a friend who is confused and worried because last week was supposedly her due date. The last time w..."

Facts Pregnant women Should Know: Postterm Pregnancies

I hope this post will be a great help to a friend who is confused and worried because last week was supposedly her due date. The last time we've met (yesterday), i coaxed her to visit an ob-gyne so she can have the best advice for her predicament. I told her to pray for HIS guidance and protection.

What is a Postterm Pregnancy?

A pregnancy that extends beyond 42 weeks is called postterm pregnancy. Usually, 9 months is the basis of pregnancy duration period. However, in today’s modern technologies, health providers are tracking the length of pregnancy by days and weeks. It is estimated that about 10% of pregnancies are postterms.

Pregnancy’s duration is still normal between 37-42 weeks. At 40 weeks it is already referred to as “due date”; the baby is just almost there.

© 2009 Nucleus Medical Art, Inc

What causes postterm pregnancies?

Even in our modern age, the cause of postterm pregnancy is unknown in most cases. But there are some patterns which experts say related to postterm’s:

·         genetic factor is one, if a mother is born postterm, the risk is higher.

·         first pregnancies

·         had a  previous postterm pregnancy

·         errors in calculation of gestational age

What are the possible treatments for postterm pregnancy?

Monitoring-this is a must to avoid higher risk. A mother-to-be should have a close contact with her obstetrician-gynecologist especially when the due date arrives and she is not yet in labor or having no signs whatsoever.

·         antenatal fetal- monitoring of the fetus if the pregnancy extends due date. This test will determine what to do next; if allowed to extend or inducement is necessary

·         non-stress testing-monitoring the heartbeats of the baby.

·         bio-physical profile-assessment of baby’s health

·         contraction stress test-inducement of uterine contractions through intravenous medication

·         inducement-a medication applied to “ripen” the cervix and dilate; and stimulates the uterus to contract

·         caesarian –either the choice of the patient or, the baby’s weight or the cervix would not dilate which makes it impossible to have a normal delivery.



 Related Readings: If a pregnant woman does not deliver in 40 weeks; is it still a normal pregnancy?
                             Pre-mature Pregnancy
                             Fetal Development

If A Pregnant Woman Does Not Deliver in 40 Weeks, Is it Still a Normal Pregnancy?

I was asked by a friend this morning. She is pregnant and is worried because she said she is already over due. She was asking an advice if she will have inducement? She was really bothered about her situation. I said that mine (my firstborn) was also 2 weeks overdue when that “most-awaited day” finally arrived. However, People said that firstborns are usually advance or late by two weeks. In her case, it’s her third baby.

According to the experts, the normal occurrence of baby’s birth is from 37 to 42 weeks of pregnancy. Before that, it is considered premature; and postterm after 42 weeks.

Related Readings: Reasons for Pre mature babies
                            Pregnancy
                            Fetal Development